Relentless Pace

The search for a loved one is relentless and there is no official handbook that explains the process when someone goes missing.  We need direction.  Do not be scared to offer us help and suggestions that are constructive and clear.  Show us the way forward, we are frozen in time. 

There have been few articles written about what a family does, or what an organization does,  but fail to address the important relationship between families and police.  Terminology usage is sometimes very formal and a bit ambiguous.  The pace of progress can be frustrating.  These are little things families need to be aware of so they don’t feel it’s just them.  It’s common.

What are the policies and procedures or lack thereof?   What should we expect in reality - not what is written in their own handbook?

To be ready to take up the search yourself when they are too busy with solvable crimes.

Missing Persons enquiries often fall beside the wayside. Cases may not always be risk assessed correctly.  Valuable details and time lost can never be recovered.   Police have dozens of runaways or county lines and dementia cases and it is easy to make simple assumptions about all cases.  Police are over burdened and understaffed.  Dedicated missing persons teams are needed in every force.  

It is imperative a family is listened to.  It takes tenacity and a willingness to challenge authority of the police and it is exhausting.  It often leads to a breakdown of communication to a level that is just unacceptable, but these cases are not a priority.

Long term missing are a category that seems to be immersed into statistics with cases which are more clear in the intentions of the missing person either repeat runaways and missing from care.  These are a huge issue but very much in another category. Yet the unsolvable long term missing cases which are out of character are the forgotten cases. No real statistics. No easy answers. No back story and no trail to follow.  Shelved too soon. 

I have learned to take each day at a time.  It is okay when mentally and physically exhausted, you  must let go, step back and allow your brain to decompress.

I am pleased to be on another think tank to support Charlie Hedges in a proposed handbook that will be helpful to families entering into this experience.